True Professor Quotes
Dana Ballard (now the most quotable man on campus)
[on plagarism] I would rather see crummy writing that is your own rather than Shakespeare that is Shakespeare.
[on his sense of humor] If you can't be teased, you have to have a note from your doctor.
[on a bizzare reference to GI Jane] [upon finishing the first assignment] That means you can be a Computational Brain Seal.
[on negociation between parties/brains] Even worse the marriage is college roommates.
[on religion] I'm a FARC. Fallen away roman catholic.
[on why professors didn't kill their annoying students] The time you spend in jail for killing a student is greater than the amount of time you have to spend with the student.
[on information on the internet] You don't even know if this guy has a Ph. D. He could be running a bar somewhere.
[on taking notes] Material goes from the proffesor's notes to the student's notes without going through the mind of either.
[on life at MIT] I wore red socks. The memory still stings.
[on the function of the hypothalmus] It maintains the 4 F Drives. Flight, Fight, Feeding and Procreation.
[on his personal success during the Industrial Revolution] I could buy a pony. All children like ponies.
[on changes in production] Machines will help in the long run, but don't tell jokes in the workroom.
[on some other industrial concept] To the Nineteenth Century, that was weird and a half.
[on ancient programmers] Hippies in the 60s are like Lepruchans. They don't exist.
[on the parking lot outside Todd and Rochester] It's pretty safe around here but the world is a dangerous place.
[on the late Leonard Bernstien] I think he's dead, but he's probably still around.